update: I accidentally threw a sandwich and it caused a work crisis

It’s a special “where are you now?” season at Ask a Manager, where all month I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past.

Remember the letter-writer whose coworker accidentally threw a sandwich, which hit their elegant, frosty grandboss, leaving an oily splotch on her suit? The grandboss mistakenly thought a different coworker, Renton, had patted her on the ass … and then when Renton was gone for two days, the office rumor mill was speculating that he’d been sent for mandatory harassment training as a result. (It’s hard to briefly summarize the details of this letter in all its glory; you should read the whole thing.) Here’s the update.

Things rather sorted themselves out. Diane (the owner of said sandwich) was very much uninclined to rectify the situation, so I spoke to Renton on my own. He burst out laughing at how terribly ineptly we handled it and he explained that he was actually on a new roster, which was why he was missing for those days I erroneously assumed he was out for “rehabilitation.” So he was in training, basically, to learn how to deal with idiotic situations. *blushes, looks around sideways*

I distanced myself from Diane, and Renton and I have actually become good friends — we snuck out for some afternoon footie today (AHEM. The Euros have started, people, don’t get salacious!) because PATIOS ARE OPEN! So I lost and gained a friend, but I have, I think, better judgement now on how to deal with absolute ridiculous happenings. I’m still pleasant with Diane, but this changed my view of her a bit, to be frank. She still uses our dictionary as a sandwich press, and FrostyBoss has worn the suit since. (I cannot lie: I had been charting her outfits. We’re talking Excel spreadsheet. So now I have wonderful ideas around how to “dress for the role you want, not the role you have”! ….I just need about an extra 40% salary increase to achieve it!) So I think it’s all good?

I also started to chat with a couple of our more chatty folks, and tried to downplay the rumours by saying that didn’t sound like Renton AT ALL, and everyone I spoke to agreed with me, and between that and our being mates and him being tagged for a seniorish role, it died off well quick. Now the big question is who on earth would have started such a ridiculous story? This might be me showing my immaturity again, but … I just rather nope out of those blathers, and say I’ve got some revision to do!

Thank you for the advice, and also to the commentary for the laughs.